i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize