we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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