I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Randomize
