I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize
