okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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