I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
