I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
