You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
