can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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