its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Come back. Shots need mouths.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
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