Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Randomize
