ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
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