It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
