Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Randomize
