God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
