I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
