I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize