First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
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