The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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