conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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