Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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