I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize