You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
