i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Drunk is not a location!
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
