in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Randomize
