I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
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