We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
