Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
