But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Randomize
