Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
