Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
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