he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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