Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize