I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
I'm bleeding and have questions
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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