Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Randomize
