1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize