I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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