That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
