Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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