I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize
