dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
We had to coat check the pizza.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
