Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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