he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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