You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize
