It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
