Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
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