just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
But break dance skills will only take you so far
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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