He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
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