I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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