I want to make a zoo with you.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
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