Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
