I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
