Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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